What next

In the first few days following my diagnosis I was fairly quiet. My family was very supportive and encouraged me that everything was going to be okay. That there was a high success rate for  curing anal cancer. I didn’t realize that Farrah Faucet had also the same type of cancer, until Dr.H had mentioned it the same day he diagnosed my cancer. So, I became curious and started researching this rare form of cancer. The more I learned, the more I didnt want chemo and radiation. Although the statistics for curing this cancer in the early stages were good, I was not looking forward to losing my hair, possible incontinence, nausea, diarrhea, burning in and  around that most sensitive area, and thats just naming a few of the side affects caused by chemo/radiation. I had been thinking of an alternative therapy all along, even before my cancer diagnosis, when I was still hoping that the blood tinged  toilet paper was possibly an internal hemmorhoid, polyp or diverticulosis. So when I did find out I that I did indeed have cancer, the wheels had already been turning about getting in contact with a friend of mine I’ll call JJ. I had worked with JJ for a few years at the hospital. Because I had worked quite closely with him for 8 hours a day, he gave me an interesting perspective on how modern medicine operates in our world today . This had a huge impact on how I now view modern medicine and how it was now potentially going to affect me.  JJ also provided me with much to say about alternative and natural ways to prevent and “cure” various diseases. Which brought me to my current treatment of anal cancer.

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Finding out I have cancer.

Finding out I had cancer was something I never thought would happen to me. Finding out I had anal cancer was even more stunning. If I were going to get cancer, shouldn’t it be breast cancer?  My first words when the doctor told me was, Really? , I see. I wasn’t totally shocked when he told me because while I was still in the colonoscopy room dozing in and out of consciousness, I heard the  doc quietly dictating my report.  He must have thought  I was still under the influence of  the narcotics and oblivious to what he was saying. And although I was definitely under the influence of the narcotics, I remember consciously trying to pay attention to what was going on in the room when they first started putting me under. The anesthesia that I received  didn’t knock me out totally 100 percent of the time, so towards what must have been the end of the procedure, I thought I heard him say something that had to do with the word “lesion”.  After being brought into recovery post colonoscopy, the nurse came in and said the doctor would be in shortly to discuss the results. Still sleepy from the anesthesia, I remember quietly crying a few tears, thinking to myself, I thought I heard him say something about a lesion, but dismissed the thought in the next few moments, not being totally sure if what I had  heard was correct due to the drug induced state of mind I was in. But, then came in Dr. H. where my suspicions were confirmed. He said, “well, you have anal cancer, possible rectal”.  We’ll have to wait for the biopsy report to be sure, but I’m pretty sure it’s anal. “If it’s anal cancer, it’s highly treatable with radiation/chemotherapy. My Dad was with me, and was in shock. He came over, kissed me on my forehead and began shedding a few quiet tears. Emotions of shock , disbelief  and fear touched us both. Wow, I had anal cancer. Thus, a new chapter in my life had  begun, a new journey that I didn’t want take.

Isaiah 41:10 “Do not fear, for I am with you; be not dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.

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